I know what i want already..After years of working, it's time i return back to my school roots. It's something i left halfway before finding myself. And after that i got lost. Anyways, yonks ago after my ITE, i actually tried enrolling in Poly for a Business course but you know what the admin clerk whom attended to me said??



"Well, our Business courses are filled up this year...you want to try for the Engineering courses instead?"



You should have seen me gasp there. I mean i studied Business and why should i take Engineering right? It's as well i go back to primary school and start all over again. And so i started working, got lost and forgot about that Diploma i was supposed to carry on taking...and years passed soon.



I am going to that Career Education fair this Saturday. I mean i pray i could get into that course. 9 months is sure enough to make me forget all this unwanted sorrows. 9 months should be enough to turn my whole life round and be a new person. 9 months is also a freaking long time and 9 months is where i really have to get my life sorted out for good. Before i know, it's end of the year. And i pray i would have already forgotten 'pain'.



Oh boy...guys sure move on faster in life than girls. Girls always consider and ponder but guys jump to the next step as if nothing even happened. I don quite get the theory there...He's moved on. And i cannot cling to that fact he's coming back into my life. That would be pathetic. I gave the idea up when i repeated it to myself daily. Confusing? Don be...it's just my way of comforting myself. Nonetheless, the idea has been aborted. The more i see, the more i know the pace. And so, today i promised myself NOT to read of those things anymore. Sometimes curiousity kills but why should i hurt myself all over again right? I tried so hard....



Dee have tried so hard. I always tell her not to fall coz if she ever fall, i would definitely fall harder. She's my pillar honestly. And the reason why i am even studying is coz, i don't wish to impose on her. I feel bad enough. (Yeah..i've been imposing on too many people lately...). That's the thing with human beings. When you have the bez things around you, you tend to take advantage and even choose and evil just rises within you without you yourself realising it. Somehow when you are alone, that is when you start to realise what are the most important things in life and what you really can't live without. That's the time you grow. You mature in your thinkings and everything else around you...but by that time, certain things are also too late.

I got this seashell by the beach last week with the girls. It was the most perfect one i could find on the shore. And it's beautiful just to look at. I like nature's creation. Saga seeds, seashells, stars, all things nice....i pick them up and keep them (cept for stars of coz..i can't reach)..just for memory keepsake. It is also a way to tone my feelings a lil. When i look at something so beautiful like this, i forget agony for a while. =)

What's my most favourite smell and sound?

Answer: Freshly cut grass and the sound of wind chimes. Aren't they just pleasing to the senses?

One day, this shell would crack..who else would admire it's beauty then?